. Regurgitated Alpha Bits: Stick My Tongue Where?

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Stick My Tongue Where?

If I haven't mentioned it before, I fear boogers. Adult snot is gross enough, but kid snot really freaks me out because chances are it has been simmering on their hot little fingers for several hours, if not days. I don't even want to think about what's under their nails.

Along those lines, allow me to share an actual conversation I had with my class today:

Me: ...so when you see an obtuse angle in a triangle it is an ob...oh! Cindy, take the pencil out of your mouth please.

Cindy: Whyth?

Me: (pause until she removes it) Because it is covered in germs and you are eating them like a germy snack.

Class: eeewwwww

Cindy: But they're all my germs.

Me: Not necessarily.

Cindy: It's my pencil. Who else would be putting their germs on it? I don't see the big deal.

Me: Here's the big deal. Picture this: It's a normal day and you are working at your seat. Everyone at your table, in fact, is miraculously focused on their work. The warm sun is shining down on your back through the window, and you stop and enjoy it. It reminds you of the warmth of Ms. Lee's smile that fills...

Cindy: eehh heemm, The PENCIL, Ms. Lee.

Me: Oh, yes, and your pencil rolls off your desk and onto the floor without you noticing. Joe sees it and removes his finger from his nose just long enough to grasp your pencil between his thumb and germy pointer finger and hand it back to you.

Class: eeeewwww

Cindy: I wouldn't take it from him then!

Me: Oddly enough, you guys never seem to notice each other's nose picking habits. Sadly, you would not even know what he had been doing just seconds before he retrieved your pencil. The point is, what was once in his nose moved to his finger and is now on your pencil.

Class: eeeewwwwwww

Me: So you get right back to work, and out of habit, start chewing on your pencil. Now, what was once in his nose but was transferred to his finger, and then smeared on your pencil, is now

IN YOUR MOUTH!

Class: eeeeeeewwwwwww!!!!!

Me: Therefore, if you are that anxious to consume another person's mucus, save yourself some time and several steps in the process.

Head straight to the source and simply go stick your tongue up someone else's nose.

Class: eeewwwwwwwwwwwwwaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!

3 comments:

sarahG said...

Ewww indeed! I'm surprised half your class didn't throw up at that point! Funny post though :)

Wamblings said...

ROFLMAO!!! eeeeeuuuuuwwwwwwww

I work with pre-school age kids and kid safe musical instruments. I'm not sure they make a disinfectant strong enough for some of what I see in my classes. I find myself reaching for hand sanitizer a LOT.

Jewels said...

LOL! I can't believe you told her to stick her tounge up his nose!